We Hold These Truths to Be Self-Evident
- Breastfeeding is both painful and wonderful.
- As soon as the baby latches on, you will have to pee.
- It's easier to change a diaper than to change the sheets.
- As soon as the guy from Sears leaves, the washer will start to smell like it's burning up.
- When you finally get a chance to sleep—and you MUST SLEEP—you won't be able to.
- Even if you go to bed at 6pm, you won't actually put your head on the pillow until after 11.
- Big boobs are a total nuisance.
- If you had a relatively normal figure before pregnancy, you will have Jane Mansfield's figure while breastfeeding. Alas, you will not have her wardrobe, and all your clothes will look ridiculous on you.
- Corollary: If you had Jane Mansfield's figure before pregnancy, you will have the figure of a porn star while breastfeeding. Your clothes will look ridiculous on you whether you have the porn star's wardrobe or not.
Posted by Lori in parenthood at 10:07 AM on December 20, 2004
Comments (3)
So does that mean that your washer is STILL NOT FIXED? How many weeks has this
been??? Has Sears not figured out that it is now time to give mother of
newborn a new washer!!!!
Posted by Shannon Ott | December 21, 2004 5:04 PM
Posted on December 21, 2004 17:04
Right. It's been 6 weeks; after the motor did indeed burn up yesterday afternoon, I finally got Sears to agree to get me a new washer. They approved it at about 4pm today, and we're going to King of Prussia to pick out a new one tonight, Austen willing.
Posted by Lori | December 21, 2004 5:07 PM
Posted on December 21, 2004 17:07
Sounds like it's going to be a wonderful Christmas for you and Al. An adorable new baby, snow and a new washer (vital to a new Mother). Wishing all of you a wonderful holiday season. Thanks for the terrific blogs all year long.
Posted by Sally Hinds | December 21, 2004 7:55 PM
Posted on December 21, 2004 19:55