Steps, Forward and Back
I was saying to a friend today that it feels like for every step forward I take, I take another (bigger?) one backwards. Maybe because I get excited about being happy for a bit, and think it's going to last... and when it doesn't, I'm disappointed in addition to sad. I'm hoping that eventually the steps forward will be bigger than the ones backward. I'm clinging to that.
In the meantime, I've asked for the next two days off from work, partly to get a bit of a break from it, but mostly so I can complete some tasks in my personal life. I want to feel a sense of accomplishment, which will hopefully breed an enthusiasm and confidence that I can bring back with me to work. Of course, the to-do list I have for those two days would fit better in two *weeks*, and I need to be careful about setting myself up for failure. I might just sleep for two days, and call it an accomplishment—because hey, at least I'll be caught up on *something*.