The Beaner Collection

While on the plane to SF today, I was reading a PDF regarding a work project on my iPhone and found myself needing to make some notes. I pulled out my Moleskine notebook to jot my questions down, but I was distracted by the Polaroid of Val and the Beaner I'd taken in Maine and stuck in the book but never retrieved. I was further distracted by all the Beaner-related conversations/stories I'd recorded in there since last September. The PDF could wait.

I know I've already blogged about some of the stories I found in the Moleskine, so I won't repeat those ones now. The ones I'm not sure I've ever blogged, or I'm sure that I haven't, follow. Forgive any unintentional repetition.

Self-Help I
Beaner: Daddy, I hurt my finger, so I'm kissing it.
Al: Does it feel better?
Beaner: Not yet.
— 01.12.08

Self-Help II
[Scene: Al is in the master bathroom, the Beaner is standing outside the bathroom door in the master bedroom, and I am upstairs in my office.]
Beaner: Daddy, say 'ayudame!'
Al: Say what?
Beaner: Say 'ayudame!'
Al: What do you want me to say?
Me: 'AYUDAME!' Help me!
Al: Oh! Ayudame!
Beaner: Mommy! Can you come help Daddy? He's in the bathroom by himself.
— 01.13.08

When I Was a Child
Beaner: A long time ago, I was a grownup and you were a kid?
Me: Were you ever a grownup?
Beaner: I don't think so. I was always a child even when I was big.
— 04.23.08, Lunch

The Beginning of the Know-It-All Phase
[Scene: All three of us are on the beach in Ocean City, NJ, flying a kite.]
Me: Let's go up on the Boardwalk for a bit.
Beaner: No, let's go up on the BOARD.
Al: Let's go up on the BoardWALK.
Beaner: No, let's go up on the BOARD and WALK.
— 05.04.08

The Whine and Switch
This is the second time this has happened; I wish I could remember the exact details of the first time. 2nd time:

We were at the Adidas Store, and the Beaner asked to buy a watch. I said no, he didn't need another watch, especially an expensive watch that he couldn't read. He whined and cajoled for a while, then finally agreed that we could put it on his list. I put it back on the rack he whined briefly, and then I went to pay for my shirts.

When we left, he whined under his breath, "I wanna _____." I couldn't hear what he said, so I had to repeat the statement back to him as a question twice before I heard the last word properly. "I wanna WATCH." I said, "I don't know what's up with this whiny... CRAP." He replied, very cheerfully, "No, I mean I wanted to WATCH you buy your shirts!"

The first time, I wasn't sure if he was doing the whine-and-switch. This time, it was absolutely clear.
— Memorial Day Weekend, Lancaster

Posted by Lori in parenthood at 1:48 PM on July 16, 2008